Post-partum Joy in Chaos

 Navigating post-partum has been a maze of emotions. Of course, the joy of motherhood and the sweet smile of my baby gazing up at me is the pinnacle of it all. But it would be a lie to say that other challenging feelings don’t arise in the midst of this beautiful newborn season. I believe that for any season of beauty there is an element of suffering to go through and obstacles to overcome in order to reach the goodness God has in store for us as even in the book of Hebrews 12:2 the Bible tells us that even Jesus had to go through suffering to reach the joy set before Him, “looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” The glory God had promised could only be received once the cross was endured, so why as followers of Christ should it be any different for us. Anything lovely you have had in this life is usually preceded by challenges. Passing exams to be successful in education requires hard work in studying. Obtaining that new job requires excelling at a series of interviews during the application process that asks for preparation. To get married means to overcome obstacles and problems that may arise to get to the love of your husband or wife. The same for having a child. A baby coming into your life means a season of major sleep deprivation, never ending laundry piles, constant dirty nappies, periods of a crying infant that needs soothing as the sound pierces your ears and leaves you feeling distressed, and a schedule of feeding that limits the freedom you so easily took for granted before. It can also be assumed that suffering draws us closer to the Lord through obedience because of the scripture in Hebrews 5:8 (NKJV), “though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered.” We know throughout the Bible that God’s love language is that of obedience. He wants us to obey His commands. When we obey His commands, we receive the wonderful promises He has for our lives. To go through these periods of difficulties to get to the beautiful destination we want to arrive at it takes obedience to God, and in turn that draws us closer to His perfect love which is what will give you the ultimate satisfaction and joy throughout this life.

When you summarise the daily life with a newborn it doesn’t come across as appealing to human nature, yet I want to experience this beautiful time again and again. It makes no sense to the rational mind. Why would someone want less sleep, more housework, cleaning up bodily fluids, compromised mental health, and your freedom to do what you want to cut back? We must look to the source of motherhood and raising babies to answer this. When we go to the source, we find ourselves to look to God. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139:13 NIV). God created us, He created our babies, and therefore He created motherhood. When we see how the Lord works, He doesn’t work purely by logic otherwise we would be trusting in ourselves and human wisdom, whereas the Bible tells us that there are different kinds of wisdom which can be earthly, or which can be heavenly from the Lord. “This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic” (James 3:15 NKJV). Therefore, the Lord’s wisdom is different to our own wisdom. As I continue, I want to make clear that I don’t have a revelation of an answer to my previous question. All I can do is reveal what God has taught me in this time and that is that joy and happiness differ from one another. Happiness is dependent on our circumstances. When we look at the circumstances of motherhood it doesn’t line up with the criteria of happiness from a human or earthly perspective. Then it can be assumed that it is rather joy that a mother experiences in the midst of the post-partum struggles rather than happiness. Maybe that is why Jesus tells us in John 16:21 (NKJV) that “A woman, when she is in labour has sorrow because her hour has come, but as soon as she has given birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been into the world.” It is joy the woman experiences rather than happiness as such. Happiness is dependent on good circumstances, but joy is a more inexplainable feeling that comes from the Lord and doesn’t always make rational sense to experience. Rather joy is a fruit that comes from the leading and guiding of the precious Holy Spirit in our lives, told to us in Galatians 5:22 (NKJV), “but the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness…” When I decided to follow Gods call for my life as a mother, He didn’t promise a smooth sailing and easy road, but what He did promise was joy amongst the chaos. There’s a beautiful quiet stillness when the world is sleeping and you’re there with your baby at 2am feeding and sustaining a beautiful life God has entrusted you with. There’s a warm feeling in your heart when those sweet eyes stare up at you for comfort once you’ve changed them and you hold them close to your chest as they sleep in the safety of your arms. There’s a gratefulness to the Lord for trusting you with a new life He created within you to raise up a child in the Lord.